Al… Alph… Right! Alfalfa Flight!

Ah, Monday – the one day of the week where no Alpha Flight members die! FUNDay continues with a new title: What The-?!, a humor magazine which will grace the FUNday posts many times over. So let’s get going for this week!

What The-?! #1
Aug 1988

The Marvel Mag of Mirth and Mayhem! That’s the tag line and the best way to describe this irresistibly silly humor book that lacked all boundaries. Filled with short parody pieces, fake ads, fake letter pages and fake bullpen bulletins, this series relentlessly tore apart anything that wasn’t nailed down while at the same time showcasing the best and most popular creators of the time. Truly a comic book, Alpha Flight makes it right into the 1st issue as Alfalfa Flight, a version of the team based on the freckled, cowlicked Our Gang (The Little Rascals) character.

Alfalfa Flight appears in the third story, “When Titans Bunch”, a ridiculous romp which starts out with the Unnecessary X-Persons and New Pubescents in battle with the Offengers. For a completely unknown reason, the Fantastical Four join in, followed by the Guest Host Offengers, the Ever-Agonizing X-Ipsofacto, the Awesome Alfalfa Flight and eventually The Bulk, Spidey-Man, The Black Panster, Low Gage, and just about every other Marvel hero (along with the Three Stooges, Daffy Duck, Popeye, Bluto, and some intruders from another comic publisher who won’t be mentioned)

Alfalfa Flight consisted of an androgynous Vindicator, Puck, White Sasquatch, Box and Northstar (not shown in this panel). Note that this issue was concurrent with Alpha Flight #61, and that Puck had been trapped in issue #60.  Similarly, Northstar had been trapped in Asgard since issue #50 but Sasquatch was still in Wanda form at the time.

In the final battle scene, you can see The Bulk bopping Sasquatch in the face and Northstar running face-first into Quicksilver (no parody name) with a BONK.  The writer eventually dies of a heart attack from writing too many characters at once.

Curiously, in the concurrent issue of Alpha Flight #61, Sasquatch has a strange interaction with a Meg, a barmaid at a local pub (no relation to the fascinating Meg from Alpha Flight #7) who is unable to pronounce “Alpha Flight” on demand fast enough for Wanda, prompting her to sarcastically correct her shaken stammer of “Al…Alph…” as “Right! Alfalfa Flight!”

Note: credits for this story are w-Peter Gillis, p-Jon Bogdanove and i-Al Milgrom.

Tags: Box (Jeffries), Northstar, Parody, Puck, Sasquatch, Vindicator (Heather)